Monday, May 07, 2007
Sometimes, i feel so out of place. Just sometimes? May be all the time these days. I really don't know why. I don't even want to talk to myself about it cuz it so doesn't help! I think am depressed. Don't ask me the whyS. I don't know! My mind's a total whirlpool right now. I know what I want to end up as, the way i should "ideally" turn out, but am constantly distracting myself. WHY???? I think that mere action has now slowly started crawling into a habit. And trust me this sucks. Like totally.I don't want anyone showing me any "pity" or whatsoever cuz I think i can make do without that. Am writing in here just cuz i felt like. Atleast "virtually" lessening the burden. I think I've got a huge ego(don't really know if people like that do admit it but to whatever!). I expect too much. Like a LOT! And the work that goes in towards that is hardly anything. Like almost nil. Is this the problem? maybe. then again, maybe not. I swear i don't know. I think am facing one of the worst dilemmas of my life. And at a completely untimely time(whatever that is). Man. this sucks. I just want to pull myself out of this. I pray it never happens with any of you.
Its so true eh... the good times never seem to end once they begin(same for the bad times). Sigh. But see am not complaining about life. Realised its high time i stop saying the dumb old "why me?" line cuz its not just me alone. I'm very well aware of how people all across the world are in stickier situations than me and that i ought to be glad and thankful to God for lots of stuff(which i really am). Alright. Enough.
I'll be surprised if you've even managed to reach this point but if you have and regretted, then am sorry Not cuz this is my blog and i really am going to pen down whatever's bothering me. like this one. And if you are a dear friend, please bear with me :)
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